Pardon My French
by subway20
Summary: Paily/McHastings one-shot. Paige wants to impress Emily and is taking French lessons. Spencer is her teacher. There's no real plot... It's just for fun.


**A/N: Thank you so much siophiefandom for the betareading and for the vote of confidence! :)**

* * *

"...God, French is such a romantic language," Emily sighed, while resting her head on Paige's shoulder. The credits of the movie _'Amélie Poulain_ ' were rolling on the TV screen.

The auburn girl smiled and softly kissed her girlfriend's forehead.

"You really think so?"

"Oh yeah," Emily answered. "I wish I could speak French fluently. Or at least, understand it better. I tried not to look at the subtitles, but it was really hard."

"Well, the actors were speaking really fast," Paige said. "I didn't even understand a single word," she confessed, earning a giggle from Emily.

"I thought you took French in high school?" the raven-haired girl asked.

She felt Paige stiffen slightly.

"Um, well, only for a month or so. I quickly jumped to Spanish class."

"Oh, okay," Emily said. She wanted to ask why, but she had the feeling that Paige didn't want to talk about it. She had become an expert at reading Paige's body language, so she just squeezed Paige's arm gently.

She was about to change the topic of conversation when Paige asked:

"You took French yourself, right?"

"Well, yes, I did," Emily said. "But it was so hard. I guess I wasn't gifted."

"I highly doubt that," Paige smiled. "I'm sure you were a natural."

 _As with everything else._

"Oh no, not at all," Emily protested. "Spencer, on the other hand..."

"Of course," Paige huffed. "Hastings was a top-notch student. Obviously."

Emily leaned back and frowned at her girlfriend.

"Paige..."

Paige shrugged. "What? I'm just saying. Nothing new here. Spencer Hastings aced French class. So what."

"Are you jealous?" Emily asked with a half-smile.

"Of Spencer?" Paige said, sounding annoyed. "Why would I be?"

"Exactly, why would you be?" Emily countered.

Paige didn't answer, but Emily could tell, if the frown that creased her girlfriend's brow was any indication, that Paige was deep in thought.

"What about we watch another movie, but an all-American one this time?" Emily suggested. "Like that Avengers movie you wanted to see? 'The age of Neutron' or something?"

"'The age of Ultron'," Paige corrected with a smile. "Yes, let's watch that."

* * *

"...You know, Paige," Spencer said in a slightly patronizing tone. "It would probably be wiser to learn how to say 'hello, how are you' and casual things like that before learning how to say 'I love you' or 'I think you're hot'. If you want to sweet talk a French girl, at least do it correctly."

"The only girl I want to sweet talk is Emily, and you know that!" Paige protested. "I'm not interested in any French girl," she muttered between her teeth.

Spencer smirked.

"Chill, McCullers. I was joking. You only have eyes for Emily Fields, we all know that. What I want to know is, why the French lessons? And why me?"

"Well, I can't really afford a real teacher," Paige said honestly. "And Emily said you were one of the top students in French class. Right after Mona Vanderwall."

"What?! I was at least as good as Mona," Spencer huffed. "And just so you know, Mona had an unfair advantage. She's been spending all her summer vacations in France since eight grade."

"Really? I didn't know that," Paige said, surprised. "She must be really good. And she was president of the French club at Rosewood High, right?"

"Maybe, at least that's what I heard," Spencer mumbled, though she knew perfectly well that fact was true. "So why don't you ask _her_ for French lessons?"

Paige bit her bottom lip, hiding a smile. Even though she and Spencer were really good friends now, they couldn't help bickering from time to time.

"Honestly? I'd rather learn with you. Seriously, Hastings, I really think that you're the best teacher. And you know, Mona still creeps me out," she confessed with a sheepish grin.

"Really? After all these years?" Spencer asked, her brows raised.

"Well, yeah," Paige said in a low voice, dipping her head. "Don't tell Hanna, please. I know that Mona is Hanna's bestie, and that she is not, well, rogue anymore. But I still can't trust her completely," she confessed.

"Oh, okay," Spencer said. "You know what, I don't fully trust her either. Don't tell the other girls. Not even Emily."

"I won't."

The two girls grinned at each other, and Spencer grabbed the French lesson book she had brought with her.

"Okay, so French 101. The basics. How to introduce yourself, how to ask for directions, etc."

"Okay. First lesson. The basics," Paige said enthusiastically. "Shoot. I'm ready. For whatever it is."

Spencer glared at the auburn girl, who was fidgeting in her seat.

"Paige. Relax. It's just the introductory stuff."

"I know, I know. Go on, Hastings."

"Okay, so I'm just gonna ask you a simple question. Very easy. Just try to understand, and give a simple answer. Don't worry about your accent yet."

Paige nodded eagerly.

" _Mon nom est Spencer, et toi_?" Spencer asked, pronouncing each word very slowly.

"Uh," Paige said. "... _Je suis bien_?"

Spencer glared at her student.

"No. I was telling you my name, and asking yours. I wasn't asking how you were doing. And by the way, the correct answer to that question is _'je vais bien'_. Not _'je suis bien_ '."

"But I thought the verb 'to be' was 'être' in French?" Paige asked, dumbfounded.

Spencer sighed. "It is. I am, _je suis_. But we don't always use the same words in the same way. You can't just, translate literally. It doesn't work like that."

Paige dipped her head. "Okay..." she said.

"You're not gonna give up now, McCullers?" Spencer asked in a defiant tone. "We've barely started!"

"Of course not!" Paige protested. "I want to learn. I really want to."

"Okay then. Another simple question. _'Où habites-tu_?'"

"Oh," Paige said excitedly. _"_ I know that one _. '...Je suis vingt et un ans_?'" she ventured.

"Really, McCullers?" Spencer exclaimed. "You're that bad?"

"I told you, Spencer!" Paige almost yelled. "I dropped French for Spanish after a month."

"Well, I hope that you're better in Spanish!"

"I am!" Paige snapped. "Hablo Español muy bien, si quieres saber!"

"Well, that's a relief," Spencer retorted sarcastically. "So why don't you work your Spanish magic on Emily instead?"

Paige looked down and mumbled something that Spencer couldn't hear.

"What?" the thin brunette asked.

"I said, Emily likes Spanish, but she _loves_ the French language," Paige said. "And travelling to France is on the top of her bucket list."

"So what, you want to take her there?" Spencer asked in a softer tone.

Paige shrugged. "I know. It's a stupid dream. It's so far away, and the trip is so expensive anyway."

"Well, maybe for now, but that's definitely something you two could do later. It's not unrealistic."

"We'll see. Anyway, I don't want to sound stupid when I'm in Paris. Or in the _Côte d'Azur_."

Spencer grinned. "I see that the whole trip is already planned," she teased.

Paige blushed. "Not at all."

"But you know that's where Emily wants to go. Paris, and the _Côte d'Azur_."

"That's no secret. She's been speaking about those places for years," Paige observed.

"Yes, that's true," Spencer said. "She's been obsessed by Paris since freshman year of high school. As I recall, she wanted to go there with..."

She bit her lip. _Oh crap_.

Spencer glanced at Paige, an apologetic look on her face.

"You can say her name, you know, Spencer," Paige said quietly. "She wanted to go there with Alison."

Spencer took a deep breath. "Well, maybe at first, but... Come on Paige, you know there's no competition anymore, right? Emily chose you. Not Alison."

Paige smiled softly. "I know. I know she did. And I'm not insecure. And I don't want to learn French because of Alison DiLaurentis. It's not a question of revenge or anything like that. We're over that. Besides, it's been years."

"Good," Spencer said, nodding her head. "But... you want to impress Emily, right?"

"Yes. Definitely. And you know what, after watching all those French movies with Em, I... I almost fell in love with the language. The musicality of it, you know?"

"I know," Spencer said. "It's the same with Italian. It's beautiful."

"But it seems I can't pronounce a single word correctly," Paige sighed in frustration. "And as you pointed out, I don't even understand a single damn thing."

"For now," Spencer said. "But if you listen to me, McCullers, and if you work hard, I promise it will get better soon."

* * *

"Paige? " Emily called out as she stepped inside their small apartment, closing the door behind her. "Where are you?"

There was no answer, but Emily could hear some noise in the kitchen, as well as some muffled music. The raven-haired beauty smiled fondly. "Honey, I'm home," she said in a playful tone.

"Emily? You're early!" Paige exclaimed. "Just don't... don't come into the kitchen yet!"

Emily frowned. "Why? What are you doing in there?"

"It's... it's a surprise!" Paige said in an unusually high-pitched voice. She sounded a little bit agitated, if not panicked, and Emily couldn't help but worry a bit.

"Is everything okay, Paige?" she asked. It wasn't unusual for Paige to cook dinner for them, but it was the first time that she was making a big deal of it.

"Yes, yes, I'm fine, Em, just... give me a minute, would you?" Paige begged.

"Take your time, I'm going to take a shower anyway," Emily answered.

Fifteen minutes later, she emerged from the bathroom, her hair still damp from the shower, wearing some grey sweat pants and her favorite Shark t-shirt.

The kitchen door was open now, and there was a delicious smell coming from it.

"Paige?" Emily asked. "Can I come in now?"

" _Bien sûr, mademoiselle. Entrez, s'il vous plaît_ ," Paige's voice answered, startling Emily.

"Paige? You're speaking French?"

A smiling Paige appeared at the kitchen door, and took Emily by the hand, pulling her into the room. Paige's auburn hair was up in a messy ponytail, and she had some white stains- probably some flour, Emily thought -on her face. She was wearing the apron that she only used when she decided to do some "serious cooking".

Emily looked around her, bewildered. The small kitchen was decorated with a French flag garland and some pictures of famous Paris monuments - the Eiffel tower, of course, but also the Sacré Coeur and the Pyramide du Louvre.

The door to the small balcony was open, revealing a table set for two, with a bouquet of red roses in a vase. Soft music was playing in the background, a French song obviously. Emily stared at Paige, mouth agape. The auburn girl was beaming.

" _Tout cela est-il à votre goût, mademoiselle_?" Paige asked, pronouncing each word very carefully. She had repeated each sentence with Spencer, numerous times, but her accent was still very much a work in progress.

That wasn't a problem for Emily, though. She had understood the general meaning of the question, and she was truly melting.

She nodded eagerly and said, with a smile brighter than Paige's: "Oh yes, it is. I mean: _oui, c'est parfait_."

Paige let out a sigh of relief. "Great. I mean, _très bien_."

Emily giggled. "Paige. Did you learn some French for me? It's adorable."

Paige dipped her head and blushed. "Well, yeah, I mean, _oui_."

"And what is all that?" Emily motioned to the scattered utensils and pots that were still on the kitchen counter. "Did you do all that cooking? My goodness, it smells delicious."

"I hope so," Paige said in an excited voice. "I mean, _j'esperais._ Or _, j'espère?"_

"It's okay, you can go back to English," Emily reassured her.

Paige frowned. "You don't like it when I speak French?"

Emily took a step forward, and grabbed Paige's hand.

"Sweetie... I love it when you speak French. It's just, don't feel obligated to do so because of me."

Paige had this cute little pout on her face, the one Emily knew all too well.

"Sorry if I went overboard," the auburn girl mumbled, looking down. "I just thought you'd like it."

Emily leaned forward and gently wiped the flour from Paige's forehead. Then she dropped a light kiss onto Paige's lips.

"Baby. Relax. I don't like it, I _love_ it."

"It's not too much?"

"It's perfect," Emily smiled, before whispering seductively in Paige's ear: "Speak French to me, please. Tell me all the sexy love words you've learned."

Paige shivered. "Okay," she said in a hoarse voice. "I have a few in store. Nothing too wild, though", she said. "Spencer wouldn't tell me any of those."

"Wait," Emily said. "Spencer is your French teacher?"

"You could say that," Paige answered with a crooked smile.

"That's why you spent so much time with her these past weeks? I was beginning to get jealous," Emily joked.

Paige rolled her eyes. "Oh come on, Em. Me and Hastings? No way."

"I mean I was beginning to get jealous of your friendship," Emily corrected. "I almost felt left out," she added.

"Really, Em?" Paige asked in a concerned voice. "You should have told me."

"No, silly. I'm just kidding. I'm so glad you're getting along with my friends. Especially with Spencer."

"Yes, I am, too," Paige said. "It took some time, but... I really like Spencer now. We have a lot in common, I must say."

"No kidding," Emily said, rolling her eyes. "So, those French lessons..."

"Yes?"

"Was that fun?"

"Uh, I wouldn't say that," Paige scoffed. "It was... challenging, to say the least. Hastings is a fierce teacher."

"I bet she is," Emily laughed.

"But it was worth it," Paige said. "At least, I hope so. _Vous allez voir, Mademoiselle Fields,"_ she said in a low, husky voice.

Emily blushed and let out a giggle, and Paige smiled proudly.

Just then, the oven-timer went off, startling the two girls.

"What's in the oven?" Emily asked.

"Oh, it's a pie," Paige explained. "A _tatin tarte_. Or _tarte tatin_?" she ventured, frowning. "Anyway, it has apples in it. And caramel syrup. It's a traditional French dessert."

 _She's so adorable_ , Emily thought.

"And, for the main course, we have _boeuf bourguignon_ ," Paige added excitedly. "It's a... beef casserole. With red wine in it," she explained.

"Sounds delicious," Emily beamed.

"And don't worry, we have some wine left for dinner," Paige assured. " _Un excellent Bordeaux. Deux bouteilles."_ She winked at Emily.

"Wow, McCullers," Emily said, impressed. _"Je vois que tu as sorti le grand jeu_."

"Uh, what?" Paige asked, confused. _Shit. Spencer didn't teach me that one. What does it mean?!_

"It just means, everything's perfect", Emily said, as if she had read Paige's mind.

"You're perfect," she whispered, leaning forward to capture her girlfriend's perfect lips in her own.

 **THE END  
**

* * *

 **A/N 1: I know it's a little bit silly and full of clichés - especially about the French language (which is not especially romantic, trust me on that!) and French food (no, we don't eat Boeuf bourguignon and tarte tatin all the time...).**

 **But I thought I could do that - toying with the clichés, because I'm French myself. ;)**

 **Well, as you've already guessed, it was just an excuse to write another fluffy Paily story. Hope you enjoyed!**

 **A/N 2: If any of you need me to translate the sentences in French, please PM me and I'd be happy to answer you.**

 **In case you were wondering, what Emily said to Paige at the end: "** _ **je vois que tu as sorti le grand jeu!**_ **" could be translated like that: "** _ **Well, you pulled out the big guns!"**_

 **Have a wonderful summer everyone!**

 **And happy "Bastille Day" to all my French and "French-friendly" readers!**

 **(btw, we don't usually say "Bastille day" in France but "fête nationale" (national holiday) or "14 juillet" (14th of July)... I personally think that "Bastille Day" is a great name! :)**

 **Love you all!**


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